I'd thought Jacob had been healing the hole in me -- or at least plugging it up, keeping it from hurting me so much. I'd been wrong. He'd just been carving out his own hole, so that I was now riddled through like Swiss cheese. I wondered why I didn't crumble into pieces.

Yeah, that paragraph from New Moon explains how I feel right now. Last night, I came across certain things on the net. I was bloghopping when I came across them. I started to make assumptions as soon as I read her blog entries. Suddenly, I feel so weak and afraid.

I wanna know more, more than this. It's not just curiosity, but more to a need. I need to know and I don't know why. But he seems like he's not willing to share. Share if this is what bothering him all this while. I wish I'm Edward Cullen at times like this, so I can know whatever on his mind. Especially what's bothering him. I wanna know all that just with one look on his face. Now when you can't be with the one you love, will you stay with the one who loves you?

I don't know if I'm going to the SB-JP coffee presentation later today. First of all, Mum's not going cause she has an appointment with her ex-secondary school mate. They haven't met since forever and eversince Mum has Facebook, she's been like meeting her old, long-lost friends like everyday. -.- Secondly, Nurul Syukriyah won't reply to my msges. Lastly, I do not have anyone to go with and I can't go there alone. Jurong is so far away and I'll feel like I'm stranded at some island. You know, I once thought Jurong Island and Jurong are the same place. Haha I know, so stupid right. But whatever, how I know there are not the same place. Do I look like I even care if Jurong Island and Jurong are not the same place? Anyways, what's there at Jurong Island? If it's an interesting place, I might consider migrating there than Pulau Ubin. But migrating to Pulau Tekong would be much better. Heh heh.. *kenings naik-naik* HAHA OKAY NO. So yeah, I think unfortunately today I will be rotting at home.

Anyways I found my Twilight book after days of searching for it inside my forever messy room. So now who wants to borrow it? And I am more than halfway done with New Moon. I so can't wait to read Eclipse then finally, Breaking Dawn. Of course, I also can't wait for the movie, New Moon which I heard will be premiering end of the year. I think I'm much more in love with Jacob Black than Edward Cullen now. He reminds me of someone. Someone who's not willing to share what I need to know. :P

I wanna watch Confessions of A Shopaholic. Actually Mum already bought the pirated dvd and gave it to me last night. But I forgot where I put it and I'm lazy to find it. I just found my Twilight book and now I've misplaced another stuff of mine. What the hell lah Intan. Need to stop being so careless and of course, forgetful. For God's sake, I'm only sixteen. I'm not even legally sixteen yet and I have a memory of a sixty year old. Pffft. -.-

This is all your fault, pantat boy. If we watched Confessions of A Shopaholic yesterday, I wouldn't even care if I misplaced the pirated dvd. Haha no lah, just joking. So not your fault. It's my cute face. It doesn't work on you anymore. Need to do find some other way(s) that can actually make you listen and cannot say no to me. *evil laughs*

More update later, maybe. It's 12.39pm already and I haven't eat anything yet. I better grab something to eat.