Every word he said was like a knife, tearing my heart apart. I couldn't stand the pain and I didn't know what to do. I couldn't even think clearly. I walked away without thinking. I could not do anything else. I had to keep moving. I walked and walked with no sense of direction. My vision was blurred with tears. My whole body went numb. My arms were wrapped around myself, trying to keep myself together which was almost impossible. I tried to breathe normally. I needed to focus, to find a way out of the nightmare.

I'm feeling absolutely hideous this morning. I didn't sleep well last night and my head aches. I almost spent the whole night deleting everything that has gotta do with him from my laptop and each time I see his name, it sent a wave of torture through me. Desperate to escape the pain, I quickly deleted everything.

My life isn't like the Twilight saga. Not even close. The Edward Cullen of my life is apparently a heartless and sardonic bastard while the Jacob Black is still giving me the cold shoulder which I totally deserve for not believing him.

To you whose name I can't even mention without intense hatred; your apology means nothing to me and forgiving you will be impossible. I promise you that last night will be the last time you see me as I do not ever wanna see your face again. I do not want to have anything to do with you. You can go on with your life without any inference from me.

To Muhd Faris; all I know is that you're not here to say what you always use to say. You were right about everything; he has never been the one for me and he has never chosen me. You're probably now unhappy due to me. I apologise and I am feeling very guilty right now for not thinking of you more. But believe it or not, in so many real ways, I did love you. Right now, maybe I can choose to have you belong to me. Unfortunately, I am still absolutely undecided about that.